08 December 2008

Can't sleep.

Thinking, and my mind won't calm down.

My brother Remo's bullshit threshold has been broken; my parents seem to happen upon misfortune one after the next; my sister Amme is struggling with juggling her family and her job in America's present economy. My own worries seem so ridiculous, in light of all that. I remember what it is to feel hopeless and desperate, and am ecstatic that I'm not there now.

This time last year, I was overwhelmed with how I felt my life and worldview were changing. Much of it, if not all of it, seems natural and is second-nature to me now. More changes may be coming, as life has a funny way of making certain that happens, but...

I'm not certain that the changes in store for me are necessarily ones I'm comfortable with. However, I'm more aware of myself, and my capacity for inner strength plus my developing ability to create inner peace through meditation means that I am now better able to handle upcoming change. At least, better able than this time last year. I'm growing and progressing, and that's good. I suppose I just wish I could take a tiny glimpse into the future, to prepare myself. And I further suppose that a good many other people wish the same thing, so at least I know we're in the same boat.

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